#30days to a more fulfilling life #Day9 – spend time with yourself

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spend time with yourself

What does it mean to spend time with yourself?

Although I’m married and I have a son, I spend a lot of time alone. We’re all three usually just doing our own thing.

All of the other people I know live far away from me. So unless I do something with my son or with my husband, I am usually by myself.

Yesterday I discovered something interesting. I discovered that there is a difference between being by yourself and spending time with yourself.

You can be by yourself all the time and still not be connected to yourself. That is usually the case for me. I am usually so busy working that I don’t have time to devote to myself.

But yesterday I took time from myself in order to spend time for myself.

Write on your wall in washable crayons

Crayons

I know. That sounds completely silly and ridiculous. But I did that yesterday. I found some washable crayons in the house and I used them to write on my wall. It was a self challenge. I dared myself to take the crayons and write on the wall. That’s not something we do as adults. We know we’re not supposed to write on the walls. That’s something that children do. And when they do it, our job as adults is to scold them. But maybe we should be joining them from time to time and letting our inner child out to play for a moment.

Writing on the wall was interesting.

It reminded me of when I was a little girl. And it was good to feel the kind of lightness we feel as children. That feeling of being free and having no cares. What I wrote on the wall was “Allow yourself to be”.

allow yourself to be

I think that we tend to lose track of who we really are once we reach a certain age. We become preoccupied with trying to measure up to one or another standard. We start caring too much how the rest of the world perceive us. And we spend pretty much the rest of our lives trying to be what we think we need to be instead of being who we are.

Spend time with yourself making something

coconut shells

Yesterday I also spent a few hours doing some arts and crafts. That’s something else we do when we’re children that most of us stop doing once we grow up.

I decided to try to make something using the two pieces of the coconut shell I split open on Day 8 to make that dairy free mango coconut ice cream. Right now I’m trying to shape it into a coconut shell clutch. It won’t be finished for a few days. So at least I have a few days that I will definitely be taking a break from my work to spend time with myself doing something that helps me get in closer connection with my truth.

 

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Monica
Singer songwriter Adelamonica AKA Avenue Sixty editor in chief. Writing as Monica for The Monica Archives. Writing has always been one of my passions. In fact, when I was a teenager, I used to tell people they should remember my name, because I was going to become a famous author. I used to live to write and write to live--not in the sense of writing for income but writing to combat depression and to feel a sense of purpose. I've written novels, poems, articles and essays that I tried unsuccessfully to get published over many years starting in my teens. When I discovered blogging several ages ago, I turned to that avenue as a means of doing what I love without having to worry about publishers and their rejection letters. Modeling is also something I have always enjoyed and something I wanted very badly to do as a teenager. So badly that I used to lie and tell people I was a model. I would carry around a large portfolio style photo album and claim it was my modeling portfolio. But, as with my writing, the people with the power to make my modeling dreams come true saw nothing in me that made them stop me in the streets of New York to offer me a modeling contract with their agency. So when I discovered the ability to photograph my own self (before cell phones and selfies) I took up a hobby of pretend modeling at home and that hobby has remained with me throughout my life as a form of self expression and self therapy. I ask that you kindly excuse my lack of worldliness and any instances where I demonstrate lack of tact or lack of knowledge and even lack of basic intelligence in my writing and posing. I'm just here trying to have a little fun doing the things that make me happy. I'm just an average human for whom writing and posing and singing and dancing and the other things I do are ways I express myself and keep myself going on this ever challenging journey of life. I hope you will find something even remotely useful or interesting in the things I share.

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